Song: "First edition grognard" (Okie from Muskogee)

[boggit]

Hi!

For no particular reason I wrote some D&D-related lyrics to the tune of Merle Haggard's immortal masterpiece "Okie from Muskogee". Provided, it's about first edition AD&D, but I'd say most of it can be applied to oldschool D&D in general. Not sure if it's to everyone's tastes, but I'm rather satisfied with how it turned out and thought that others might enjoy it as well.

"First edition Grognard"
Tune: Okie from Muskogee

We don’t have any dragonborn in Hommlet
A dwarven magic-user cannot be
And clerics must have deities to worship
As stipulated in the DMG

The purpose of our party isn’t loving
Every orc is evil through and through
And we don’t stay our hands and spare their children
Like the 5e hippies in the game store do

[CHORUS]
I’m proud to be a first edition grognard
Livin' by the dice and Gary’s grace
We fear only level drain and poison
And monsters with a petrifying gaze
[/CHORUS]

We don’t hand out credits for attendance
We fight for our lives to get XP
And I can still recall the taste of triumph
The time that I survived to level three

CHORUS

…And monsters with a petrifying gaze
In the first edition of AD&D

[Starbeard]

Seems to fit squarely within orthodox filking tradition, I approve.

[Starbeard]

A filk!

Oh where, oh where can our fighting-man be?
He must have gone climbed up a tree.
Our thief and our wizard are stuck in melee [that's a pronunciation joke]
Oh where, oh where can he be?

O — Bring back, bring back,
Bring back my fighter to me!

[Deleted]

May 2, 2021 13:22:08 GMT -6 Starbeard said:

Seems to fit squarely within orthodox filking tradition, I approve.

Lee Gold would be proud. 

[boggit]

May 2, 2021 13:22:08 GMT -6 Starbeard said:

Seems to fit squarely within orthodox filking tradition, I approve.

Filking! Never heard that word before. Very useful!

Oh and thanks!

[bobjester0e]

I remember Dragon Magazine having songs like this in its annual April Fools editions! This song would have fit in perfectly!